I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
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