Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
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