No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
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