Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
So I just went to clothing optional bar
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
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