don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
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