i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
Randomize
