Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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