is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
Randomize
