you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
It's not a walk of shame if you run
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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