physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
I want to be your penis for a week.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
