pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
Randomize
