Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
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