I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
Randomize
