:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Boobs speak an international language.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
is that a dick in a sweater?
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
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