Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
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