Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
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