I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
My six-margarita-deep ass just used a blow torch to light the match that lit my bong pack. Peak single 🤦🏼♀️
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
Randomize
