Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
your like the ambassador to my penis.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
She's just so happy...and so naked.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
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