I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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