How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Your penis caused this!
Randomize
