I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
I realized as I was wesiging my engamemby ring that you'd never love me tha same. I have life plans and Sam showed them to me
What? You're not speaking real words.
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Randomize
