Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
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