Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
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