My roommate and I had a nyquil contest. The nyquil won.
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
NoShamevember. You game?
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
Randomize