dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize