Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
Randomize
