I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
