Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
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