still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
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