I looked at my own cervix.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
