I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
Randomize
