Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
Randomize
