He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
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