I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
Randomize
