Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Randomize
