i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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