you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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