nut hugger
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize
