who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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