Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
Randomize
