He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
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