it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Randomize
