Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Randomize
