I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
Randomize
