Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
