We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
you tried to scramble eggs in my dryer last night. i want you here in 15 minutes to clean this shit up
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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