I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
Randomize
