Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
Randomize
