$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
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