pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
